Monday, December 15, 2014

Dear Sprout,


October 17th, 2014

Dear Sprout,

When I first thought the test was negative, I was sad. But when it changed to say that you were here, I cried to the mirror and told it I was scared. Maybe you heard all of this.

It didn't feel right to celebrate yet. I had to be sure that you were real; that I shouldn't play drinking games tomorrow with my friends; that we would name you something that would come before the last name we already shared; that I would dress you in jammies like I used to dress my dolls; that I would bring you around with me feeling like I couldn't remember a time that you weren't there; that we would put your small bed in our small room; that Scott and I were going to be your mom and dad forever. So I took two more tests that came up positive, then Googled "Faint lines on pregnancy test", since that's what they were. Google said that no matter how light the lines were, that a positive pregnancy test is a positive pregnancy test, just like a positive drug test is a positive drug test. When I looked at the other images of pregnancy tests online, I saw one that produced words, not lines, and feeling that this needed to be spelled out to me, I knew I needed that one. 

The reason I took the test in the first place is because I checked the waves and they were crap, so I decided to go to the skatepark. But if you know anything about my skills as a skateboarder, you know I have the tendency to fall a lot and I've wanted to protect you from the start, so I decided to take the test to make sure I wouldn't accidentally endanger you if you were here. We did not go to the skatepark, but instead to CVS to get the more conspicuous kind of test.

On the way there, I yelled inside of my car at some bikers to ride on the sidewalk if they were going to ride in the street so slowly! Then I started talking to you and decided that it was too weird. I told you that I felt that way only because I am weird and that you might suffer the same affliction yourself. Then I decided it might be best if I didn't say anything at all. 

At CVS, I purchased four more tests and walked up to the cashier all puffy eyed, dropping the handful of tests onto the conveyor belt. I realized then that I wasn't wearing my wedding ring since I had planned to go surfing. The situation in front of the cashier must have appeared very different than it actually was in real life. 

The new tests confirmed it. You were with me now and forever.

I called Scott at work. It was only 10:30 in the morning, but I asked him if he would come home. He said "I'm sorry love, I can't. I have a lot to do today and a meeting at 3:00 p.m. Why?" And I said "I just miss you... Can you come home?" Which prompted him to ask "Is everything ok?" and I said "Yeah, I'm just driving. Sorry if I sound weird! I better go!" even though I was sitting on the couch in the living room. I was never planning to tell him over the phone. 

I had a bunch of work to do on the computer, but instead I called our health care provider and another local counseling agency for moms and asked a million questions like "Is it ok use the microwave?" and "Can I wear deodorant?" and confessed that "Yesterday I cleaned our shower with Kaboom! I know it's super poison because once I saw a spider three feet away curl up and die at the smell of it!" She told me some scary stuff about babies being born with their stomachs on the outside, but that you were probably fine. Then I went back to CVS to buy prenatal vitamins. I got the same cashier, so he definitely knew the outcome of the tests I purchased earlier. When I got back home I watched Friends and downloaded new apps for my phone with the word 'baby' in them until Scott, your dad, came home hours later. 

There were suggestions online about how to share the news with your husband in a bunch of cute ways. 'Stick a pregnancy test in a bun in the oven and tell your husband to take it out', one suggested. But I couldn't even fathom doing that. Instead, when your daddy came home he said, "What's up?" and I said "Let me show you something I did today" and led him to a bunch of sticks I peed on sitting in close proximity to the sink he uses to brush his teeth. They were all positive. He cried before he said anything and then I did too because now it was time to celebrate you. 

Love,
me-- your mom (wow, this is still a little weird!)

34 comments:

  1. Eeeek just saw your baby news CONGRATULATIONS that is sooo exciting!! You and I are due almost exactly a month a part, I'm due 25th May:) That is seriously such great news!! The surfing I'm kind of fascinated about, I had planned on doing plenty body boarding over December but I know from teaching Pilates that you don't lie on your stomach after the first trimester (and well even the first because well you don't need to risk it in Pilates cause there are other things you can do) and I also find even pressing against my stomach against the sink or something feels yuck so I'm interested to know how it works with surfing?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Carey and congratulations to you too! It's so fun knowing other people who are going through the same thing. Wishing you a safe and healthy pregnancy! As for the stomach thing, I've heard it's bad to lie on your back after the 1st trimester, but I read stomach is ok, it just may be uncomfortable? (this is where I read that --> http://www.babycenter.com/406_is-it-safe-to-sleep-on-my-stomach-during-pregnancy_1245307.bc). I've heard later in pregnancy, with surfing, that you have to support yourself on your chest, not stomach. I'll be sure to post about how it goes if I do try it!

      Delete
    2. Oh cool, I'm sure your doc would warn you if it was dangerous. With Pilates they make you study pregnancy and everything on your tummy is a no, but I think because you put pressure onto the stomach, I guess surfing isn't direct pressure. Hope you're enjoying this next part, so much better than the 1st tri hey:)

      Delete
  2. This is the sweetest thing in the world. I'm so excited for you guys! I have no idea how you waited to tell Scott. I'm so glad James was home, or I would've exploded.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so excited for you guys! I can't wait to swap stories and notes! Stoked to go through this with you girl! As for the waiting--it was nearly impossible. I wanted to tell someone so badly I never thought I'd make it. Thank God for "Friends" (and this isn't the first time I've said that).

      Delete
  3. the whole story is so sweet and real :) the cashier parts are funny!

    congrats,again!! how amazingly exciting!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Victoria! I couldn't believe I got the same guy twice-- so funny.

      Delete
  4. Okay this is going to sound sort of weird.
    But I found out I was pregnant on the same day as you and we also have the same due date.
    How exciting and crazy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *Fist bump* ... Congratulations! I love hearing this! This is probably my favorite thing about blogging--when you share your story and you connect with other people going through the same thing and sometimes feeling the same way. Feel free to email me anytime. It would be fun to check in with you to see how you're doing! Hopefully you're getting through the morning sickness part alright. I *think* mine is getting better (wishful thinking? ;)

      Delete
  5. Three days later and this is still awesome news, Devon. Yours and Scott's faces in these photos are a picture! I also found out at the weekend that a good friend of my Hubby's is having a baby, also due in June :) There must be something in the water, hence why I'm sticking to coke, no ice ;) xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Congrats to your friend! I feel like people with June due dates are just starting to share the news like we are, so I'm excited to hear about and meet others in the same boat. lol, about sticking to Coke!

      Delete
  6. oh my....Devon, congratulations!!!! congrats for both of you and Scout. this baby is so lucky to have you guys as parents.
    and of course, you wrote it beautifully. i'm so happy for you :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Niken! It's so fun to share this news with someone like you who has been reading for a while and has become an online friend to me.

      Delete
    2. :) it's kinda weird when you read snippets of life from someone else's life and you feel like you know her your entire life that you're smiling from ear to ear and feeling excited reading about her about to have a baby. haha. the best thing about internet (and blog) i think. so glad to have an (online) friend like you!!!!

      Delete
  7. Oh my goodness, I just love this. Real life right there. I love stories like these. I'm so happy for you guys! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Rach! I feel so relieved to finally be able to share about this!

      Delete
  8. Aww <3 I can't wait for the day when I find a man and get to have this sort of experience...it sounds so exciting! I once ran into a woman in a Cookies by Design bakery who was buying a bouquet of baby boy-themed cookies, and she told me she was using them to tell her husband about her "little surprise". But I think your idea was better! :)
    ~ Samantha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Cookies by Design thing was probably really fun to present and experience. I was nowhere near that organized or level headed in presenting our news. Thank you so much for the sweet note! :)

      Delete
  9. What a beautiful post, and you're looking radiant. Scott is too in fact! I love that you've written these memories down, you can all look back on them one day. Wonderful. CJ xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you CJ. It was definitely a day I wanted to record so I could make sure I remember all the little details I could :)

      Delete
  10. CONGRATULATIONS!! Super Congratulations to you and Scott!

    I remember I took more than one test and I cried and I laughed and was amazed all at the same time and successively in the span of only a few minutes. It's such an exciting and scary time.

    Now, being 19 months removed from the end of pregnancy I'm looking to do it again, but the shock and awe I doubt will be any different.

    Take it easy on yourself and Listen to Your Instincts, not anyone else's. Many Mom Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing your story! I love hearing about other people's experiences. Your advice is good too :)

      Delete
  11. Congratulations to you both Devon! Your about to embark on a road that is so amazing! Super excited for both of you guys! I'm a dad twice over to two amazing girls that we adopted. I can't describe how great it is! The road your about to drive down will have so many twists and turns but you'll always have so much fun creating so many memories along the way. Such a well worded post as well!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Ross! It's great to hear how much you enjoy parenthood!

      Delete
  12. Congrats you two (three, wow!) ! Lots of hugs from Finland, I'm still following your stories even I've been more quiet since "bons baisers de france" ended :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Sini! Thank you! I'm so happy to still stay in touch with you! Wishing you well over there in Finland!

      Delete
  13. Congrats Momma ;)
    and soon, soon, there will be a time when it's hard to remember life without the little "sprout"
    and from then on out, time runs away faster than you can ever imagine.
    happy for you and scott!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Misty! It's hard to imagine, but I believe you!

      Delete
  14. Congratulations to you and Scott!!!! You are going to be the most amazing parents! I loved reading these two posts and I'm so happy and excited for the both of you :) Yay!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Jes! It's so nice to finally share the news with my friends from the internet! :)

      Delete
  15. Devon I am so goofy happy reading this news! Congratulations I can't imagine this happening to a nicer person, I'm so massively stoked for you both. Lots of love from England! xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are so sweet! I can feel the love from England all the way to the west coast of the USA! Thank you Sophia! I'm lucky to have your support.

      Delete
  16. I LOVE THIS STORY!!!!! I am so excited for you both. Your baby is going to be SO adorable and will arrive into such a great family unit!!! I can't wait to hear all about it!!! Congratulations! oxox

    ReplyDelete
  17. I can't believe I missed this! Well actually as the mom of a 2 month old I can, but still....AH! I'm so excited for you and what will be the best time of your life! YAY! I absolutely love how you told your husband too...so real and honest and hilariously described. Congrats!

    ReplyDelete

I love to hear from you! I try to reply within the comment form.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...