Friday, July 13, 2012

Getting Back to Better

    Remember last week when I said I was having a bad day? Well things got better, as they do, before they got worse. I will get to that. 
     I went to a really fun bachelorette party over the weekend for my friend Kate. We hung out at the pool and had plenty of girl time in Palm Springs. 
     There's something so enduring about my relationship with Kate. Maybe it's because our friendship had a point when it wasn't friendship; when bitterness and resentment took the place of compassion and appreciation. Through all of this, though, we fought back and found love and thankfulness for one another. If you had told me our friendship would have grown back I might not have believed you at the time, but it did, just like daisies live through the snow and come back smiling in the spring time. I'm so glad. 
     After all the excitement, however, it was time to return to reality. To accept the fact that my great Aunt Jody died (I talked about how she had cancer here), to mourn her and attend her funeral. To be with family. To have those deeper moments of reflection when you ask yourself if you are using your time living in the best way possible.
      Aunt Jody's funeral took place on the hottest day of the year so far. I thought the paint would melt right off the car as we drove over to the wake. It didn't make things worse, though. Not to me. I like the heat and something about it made everything move slower. I had time to look into my relatives eyes, to notice what color they were and what they might have felt on that day. The heat made Aunt Jody's favorite candy, Dove dark chocolate squares, taste even better as they turned to chocolate goo in our mouths.
     Now that all of this has passed I am left with a cold. In the summer? When it's hot out?! I couldn't believe it either. To top it off, I tweaked my back surfing on Tuesday. Don't mistake these words for bitterness, though. I'm grateful, as grateful as I know how to be, for the things I have and the people I have loved. I know my Aunt Jody knows how much she was loved, and in the end that's all that really matters, right?
     Sometimes life has it's own way of telling you to slow down and that's exactly what I plan on doing this weekend. What are your weekend plans? The weather has been downright crazy around here. It's humid and it rained; hot little drops that kissed my skin. I feel like I'm in the tropics or something. Scott and I have been playing Gin Rummy and things are back to better again.

15 comments:

  1. This was so beautifully written. Things really do seem to get better before they get worse, huh? But then they get better again, as you said :) And I can tell you're realizing that the bad times make the good times that much better.

    I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your Aunt Jody. Death truly, truly puts everything into perspective. Wishing you a million better days and weeks to come :)

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  2. I'm so, so sorry about the loss of your Aunt. Praying you get lots of rest this weekend and that next week is better for you girl!

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  3. So sorry for your loss! Sending lots of good thoughts and hugs your way. I hope you feel better and have a nice relaxing weekend!

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  4. wonderful post!

    glad things are better for you now!

    have a lovely weekend!

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  5. I'm very sorry to hear about your aunt.
    But I must say, I do admire your positive outlook on these bad situations. Keep it up! More of us need to be like that :).
    -Jess

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  6. I'm pretty sure I've said this to you before but i'll say it again... you darling, are a phenomenal writer. through this post i felt like i was there with you and understood your feelings. I'm so very sorry about your aunt and my prayers go to you and yours love.

    Mariel

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  7. I loved the line "sometimes life has it's own way of telling you to slow down"...so so true. I'll be remembering that this weekend. And I'm very sorry to hear about your aunt. Hoping things continue to get better for you! :)

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  8. yes this weather is terrible!!! either rain or be sunny, this in between junk is making me nuts.

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  9. So, so sorry to hear about your aunt!

    I'm right there with you on the cold! I woke up with it last week and still can't shake it. What the heck?! Hope you feel better soon :)

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  10. I am so sorry friend. For all of it. Gin rummy at home with your hot husband should make you feel a little better. ;)

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  11. I'm sorry about your Aunt. Sending you a hug.
    I hope you get a good, relaxing weekend in.
    Our weather here has been weird too. Beautiful day the other day and HUGE thunderstorm at night. Biggest one I've ever seen. We maybe get thunder once a year so it was cool.
    I hope you get more rummy in this weekend. :)

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  12. You are such a sweetheart Devon! My Grammy loved you very much and you were very special to her. You are a blessing in my life and I am so happy to call you family!

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  13. I'm sorry you had a rough week, lady. I miss you guys and feel bad that we haven't made time to hang out this summer. Hope to see you soon.

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  14. So sorry you're sick! Hope you get better quickly!

    PS love that picture

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  15. Words cannot express how sorry I am for the passing of your Aunt Jody. Cancer is a many headed beast bringing the shock of diagnosis, the trials of treatment, the ups and downs of results-which have the ability to shift entire weeks from good to bad, and unfortunately for far too many families and loved ones: death.

    I completely understand a lot of where you are coming from, because someone I love very dearly is currently fighting. While I don't ever want to say that there are positives to moments as painful as this, for me, it has brought a lot of perspective and I hope that even in mourning you can find this and remember the joy/strength of your Aunt Jody.

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